So it ain't pretty, but I've added 6k8 pull ups to all the motherboard data lines to bring the whole pull-up resistance down to about 4k.

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Also, I found a 5k pull-up on the reset line solved that oscillating reset problem at 50MHz.
The system as a whole is now running very nicely. Touch wood, I haven't seen any memory issues yet.
However it's not helped with the DSP at all. I haven't faced doing the same sticky-out resistor trick on the 22 address lines yet, but I ought to do that for completeness.
The DSP just seems so temperamental. Going back to the 40MHz oscillator didn't restore functionality either. It's very strange indeed.
Steve mentioned the additional DMA clock pull-down -- I'm not sure there's any cross pollination with the tests I'm doing, but it perhaps would be worth looking at anyway.
BW